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dog stories
A Collection of Dog stories (a book) by havoc Angel!?

I heard rumors Havoc Angel was coming out with a book about his dog… I would definately buy it!

I would LOVE to read it!!! I am signing up at the library NOW to be the first in line to check it out!

Cool Shaggy Story

A Shaggy Dog Story

1. My secretary hits me with a call from my second cousin, once removed, on my Mother’s side, Tommy the horseplayer.
2. He is a deadbeat and a miscreant (evil) relative, and someone you should run away from like your behind was on fire.
3. Tommy is broke again, and needs $150 to play a horse at Monticello racetrack where he is. Naturally the nag is a sure thing because as an insider, he knows the fix is in by the mob guys.
4. He offers as collateral his pedigreed collie male, Jack London, professional breeding stud worth over Ten Grand. It was true, and his sole asset.
5. He don’t know I would give him (Tommy) the $150 if he just signs a contract never to call me again. I say yeah for my dear departed mother’s sake.
6. He needs the dinero wired to Monticello Raceway, upstate N.Y. He’ll deliver the collateral when he gets back to NYC.
7. Tommy calls back later: two things: the horse loses, and Jack London the collie breeding champion – died. On behalf of both of them – very sorry.
8. I say, “Tommy bring me Jack London’s corpse, I’m going to recoup my

$150.” He answers with the universal question – “But how?”

1. “Not your problem, prove the collie exists and died, or get-out-of-town.”
2. Here’s where you, dear reader come in. How did I take in $1,150 for my lost

$150? You figure it out and the first hand up wins $100 cash, tax-free.

1. I read all your emails, but nobody got it. You want the answer?
2. Hint: I control a 501 (c) (3), a not-for-profit, IRS approved charity.
3. We can hold legal Raffles (lottery for a prize) anytime for any reason.
4. Now, 258 folks each bought a $5 raffle to win the $10,000 breeding stud.
5. You say, “But the dog was dead!”
6. The raffle never mentioned the deceased nature of the collie Jack London.
7. You say, “But didn’t you get complaints when they found out the

dog-was-dead?”

1. I answer: – “Sure, but only one complaint, and that from the winner. I

show the raffle winner the corpse of Jack London and offered it to him, plus

I give him his $5 back.” He could have the dog stuffed in memorial, right?

19. That left my charity with a return of $1,145.

The non-profit gave me my $150 back and $490 for my fund raising efforts.

The charity earned $650 – found money they never would have seen.

1. Yes, it’s IRS legal to pay a fund-raiser up to 60% of what they bring in.
2. Tommy the horseplayer still calls me up with sure things. I tell him,

“No! – unless you got good collateral like before.”

1. He is saving up to buy another stud breeding collie to be registered as Jack London, #2. I hope this time the dog lives. Aha! Moment? See ya, H

copyright 2009 H. Bernard Wechsler

www.speedlearning.org

hbw@speedlearning.org 1-877-567-2500

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About the Author

Author of Speed Reading For Professionals, published by Barrons; business partner of Evelyn Wood, creator of speed reading, graduating 2 million, including the White House staffs of four U.S. Presidents.